The quintessential parenting experience

So we're at my in-laws' house in OH and my daughter (age 5) alerts me this morning at 6 AM that her 'tummy hurts'. I, being the sensitive father that I am, tell her to take a drink of water and go back to sleep.

I proceed to go downstairs and continue working on a blog post. About 20 minutes later, I hear a muffled yell coming form her bedroom. I run up-stairs an find her laying in bed with both of her hands clamped over her mouth and now she's whimpering. She's being a total trooper and trying to keep her yak off the bed.

I quickly scan the unfamiliar room looking for a trash can or bucket she can unload into. No luck.

I make the decision to pick her up and carry her to the bathroom. Here's where I made a critical error... I carried her facing me. Needless to say, after about 7 steps, I looked like a first row audience member of that watermelon-smashing idiot - Gallagher.

Lesson learned: never carry a loaded weapon or sick 5-year-old with the business-end facing you.